heartbreak & healing
I have been delving into so much grief, loss and trauma lately and holding the people I work with in the depths of their muck.
It is such a profound space to hold indeed and one I do not take lightly. Being a space holder of this caliber is something I am able to hold because of the depth of my own soul and what I have been through personally in my journey.
With trauma, comes wisdom.
I truly believe we all deserve this type of space holding to process our wounds and be witnessed to the core of our being in our hurt. There is something so deliciously special, raw and authentic, about our pain and being seen in that pain, that is deeply transformative.
We often hide our vulnerability out of fear of being hurt.
I know this to be true, because I am one of the most vulnerable, soft, deep and heart felt human beings. These are my gifts to the world and all these beautiful qualities are the ones I would try my hardest to hide my entire life. Wearing masks and false identities to protect myself from the pain of being hurt and allowing people to see the true me, because I believed I was unlovable at my core. I truly believed these qualities were hideous and had to be stuffed down deep inside.
They were in the shadows so long, that they became distorted and I chose to empowered other parts of me that I felt offered more safety and protection. Things like my wild woman, party girl, ‘don’t give a fuck’ persona that I LOVED to embody. My superficial and cold hearted bitch personality….. all fake, all not my truth and reality of who I was at my core.
Because I cared so deeply about my soul and my spirit, I never wanted to commit to anyone out of fear that they would see these parts of me and would not hold them with love and grace. That they would truly see me and turn away from me.
At our core, we do truly want to be loved, seen, understood and held with such an embrace, that the skies open up and shower us with divine blessings of love from within.
The feeling of home. The feeling of warmth and divine spark.
But how can we ever expect anyone to truly see us in our wholeness, if we hide these parts of ourselves, and do not let our pain and wounds be witnessed and kissed?
This kind of rawness, authentic expression and organic emotion from deep within is fucking beautiful!
We think it is repulsive, we hide it, we contract, we allow ourselves to stay small and therefore stay stagnant…..
But in actual fact, it is absolutely fucking divine.
Open hearted, expansion, vulnerability, deep grief and heartbreak, being SEEN in it and truly allowing ourselves to be witnessed in this way is a gift.
We get to see divinity and taste the realness of life to its fullest expression.
We transmute.
We inspire.
We allow the gift of showing others how safe it is to be seen in this way, express in this way and held in this way.
You will be received and celebrated.
The gift of allowing another the honour to hold you.
The gift of real.
The gift of opening your heart.
The gift of healing.
The gift of heartbreak.
Could there be anything more worthy of art and poems that transcend time?
The delicious honey of healing, is allowing others in, seeing your heartbreak, holding you and knowing, that without a shadow of a doubt, that your grief, sadness, pain and wounds are sacred as fuck and worthy of the light too.